The Feeding of Dave and John

10] When the apostles returned, they reported to Jesus what they had done. Then he took them with him and they withdrew by themselves to a town called Bethsaida, [11] but the crowds learned about it and followed him. He welcomed them and spoke to them about the kingdom of God, and healed those who needed healing.
[12] Late in the afternoon the Twelve came to him and said, "Send the crowd away so they can go to the surrounding villages and countryside and find food and lodging, because we are in a remote place here."
[13] He replied, "You give them something to eat."
They answered, "We have only five loaves of bread and two fish--unless we go and buy food for all this crowd." [14] (About five thousand men were there.)
But he said to his disciples, "Have them sit down in groups of about fifty each." [15] The disciples did so, and everybody sat down. [16] Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke them. Then he gave them to the disciples to set before the people. [17] They all ate and were satisfied, and the disciples picked up twelve basketfuls of broken pieces that were left over.

And lo, David went out and in the valley of St.Michael's and he did gather himself two fishes, his Disciple John did applaud him and the two of them ate the two fishes heartily. In fact so good were the fishes that disciple John did say unto David that he had never tasted salmon like it before. David did say unto John that it was in fact Trout, a row broke out as the two glutenous "apostles" full to the gunnel's on freshly caught fish argued as to the fishes identity, Meanwhile the poor, the, unemployed and the hungry could only look on as a fully qualified chef with every means of cookery known to man at his disposal could only feed himself and John whilst over two thousand years ago a humble carpenter with no knowledge of the catering trade whatsoever managed to feed an entire five thousand seater open air restaurant with not so much as a frying pan or a court bouillon sauce.